with nervousness. Which is unusual for me. But I’m still nervous about the clergy retreat that begins tomorrow. It’s been a long time since I’ve been this anxious about anything. Which means that it must mean a lot to me. Which, at other times in my life I would think was a setup. But not this time.
Gordon–also known as Real Live Preacher–invited the participants to introduce ourselves and say a few words about why we’re going. I found myself writing: “My hope for the weekend is that I will touch the hem of Love’s garment and be willing to say “yes” to whatever is offered.” That just popped out and it surprised me. But it is very honest. I have a deep faith that Love will be present. And I can feel the softening of my heart already beginning.
Somehow, I expect to cry a lot this weekend. Tears of grief, yes, but also tears of recognition and re-creation and renewal. I’m not afraid that my hopes are too high because I trust Love. And I’ve come to understand that Covenant is a place where Love dwells.
Wish me luck…or whatever is needed to be open to that Love.